Tiger and Lurch - separated at birth

I'm sure everyone has heard about the Tiger fiasco the last couple of weeks - it's all over the news. What a major AH!!!! When I read a couple of the texts he wrote to one of his mistresses, I nearly spewed my coffee all over my keyboard! Is there a warehouse for pickup lines for losers? It sure seems so - Tiger and Lurch used nearly the same ones. The text that caught my eye was this one from Tiger to Rachel Uchitel:
I finally found someone I connect with, someone I have never found like this. Not even at home. Why didn't we find each other years ago? (see radaronline.com)

This is the text I got from Lurch:
I feel like after 156 years, I finally found someone I WANT 2 talk 2. Yeah I think of doing more than talking, >:-), but its talking & laughing that I think about alot. Definitely a new thing 4 me.

As you can see, it the same type of BS - all lies to try to make a woman feel 'special' - ooooh you're the only one - I've been looking for YOU all my life. Hah...
So after I got that text, of course I asked him what he really meant by it and if he really meant what it seemed like he texted. Naturally, he tells me that he feels like he has waited all his life to find me - no one else has ever made him feel as good as he does when he is near me or talking to me. He has NEVER had such a connection with ANYONE else EVER- it is so 'speschul.' Then he throws in the BS about Bertha and him not connecting on ANY level and the huge mistake it was to marry her on the rebound and how he could not wait till he could get rid of her to be with me.

Oh, gag me. If that were really true, he would not have been going home to his (as we know now - stupid/desperate/gullible) wife. But, oh wait, he was sleeping on the couch!!!

If he really meant it: he would have gone to a lawyer to begin the divorce proceedings and moved out into the barn (or in with his parents or wherever) until Bertha was gone.

What he really meant: I was trying to impress you so that you would have sex with me. I thought if I could make you think that I found you extra super duper triple dipple special beyond belief, you would give me some 'p'!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I guess it worked for Tiger because he is worth $$$$$$$$$$$$$ and the bimbos he found were looking to get a chunk of it. How sad. Lie down with dogs, wake up with fleas.  It's probably working for Lurch too - there are plenty of desperate women out there looking for a man to 'complete' her (or support her is more like it).  He simply needs to stay within or below his league and not try to move way up.

I'm Almost Back

I know it has been awhile. I have been super busy with competitions (we won GRAND CHAMPION in our last ride!!! wahoooooo!!!), work, and traveling. As I am at home sick as a dog today, I had some spare time to mess around on the computer. I will pick up regular posting after DST ends.

I was catching up on the celebrity gossip and found this story. This is probably the situation Lurch wanted (minus the kids - of course).

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-1222011/I-let-man-I-love-lie-wife-years--complete-fool-I-been.html

This woman truly is a complete idiot. The things her cheating, spineless, scumbag lover (more like - USER) told her sound like some of the crap Lurch tried with me. She needs to get some self esteem and quit talking to the bastard. Unlikely to ever happen - especially since her daughter is his.

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On the Bertha front, it appears that Lurch has tossed her in the trash. Someone at work told me that he had scrubbed her from his horse training website (it used to be a lovey dovey couples horse training site: "Lurch and Bertha met over a hot, steaming pile of horse manure and it was love at first smell"; "together we have over 100 years of horse experience"; "Lurch and Bertha share kisses and cooties with each other and the horses"). I took a quick peek and I'll be darned, she is gone!!!

Actually, I hope that Bertha found some self worth, dumped the jerk, and demanded she get taken off the site, but that is unlikely as well. She didn't even have the balls to have a f2f with me like she claimed she wanted. Once a doormat, always a doormat. Fortunately I have not heard a thing from her since her last rant. But she does check the blog several times a day.

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Remember - PAPERS first - NO exceptions. NEVER settle for sloppy seconds.

The Turd in the Punchbowl

I have to admit, I am really starting to agree with one of my readers. Everytime I read a message from Ides, I think of her as the proverbial turd in a punchbowl. She is nothing but a ventriloquist dummy spouting off the crap that her husband whispers in her ear. So much so that I am almost feeling sorry for her husband!!!! I said ALMOST.....

I think Ides could make puppies cry, kittens turn ugly and have bunnies boiling their own pots of water with her incessant whining and complaining.

No more!

Ides - if you want to know anything either call me or email me (from your own email address - and I will know if it is from you.) Quit commenting here. Grow a spine. I am going to ignore you otherwise. You haven't got a clue what really happened and your source of information is a fountain of bullshit that you are liberally drinking from.

My next post will be "The Divorce List". I promise that I will return to my snarky ways and provide valuable information on rotten men and their cheating ways . :-)

Good Grief, Charlie Brown

Please see comment from Ides on last posting:


OK - enough. I have no idea about the stupid e-mail. WTF? I requested that e-mail account be closed by the domain and last time I checked it was.
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I am sorry if you are upset if the email is not from you. However, I seriously have my doubts. If I were in your position I would be more worried about who had hijacked the email address and was emailing from it- Lurch perhaps? I would also be trying to confirm that it was my mother's email in the first place...... You just blew it off and jumped right into blasting me.

So, if there is someone out there that wants to step up and get Ides off the hotseat and take credit for sending me the email that just so happens to be Ide's mother's name and initials, please do. I would like to keep the record straight.
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I ask my questions on this blog (and the other that is still up) and always have.
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And that is your main problem. You should have taken me up on my offer(s) to talk with you outside of this blog.
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Think what you want and believe the woman who has the class to engage in an affair with a married man. That makes her look really good doesn't it?She will talk, kiss, meet with, text and F*&k a married man but will not answer a simple question???
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I don't even know what to say to this mess. Why on earth would your husband be so determined to say that we had an affair when we did not??? It's usually the other way around - with the husband denying it and the 'other' woman accusing him of it. It makes no sense to me - unless he is trying to elevate his standing among his low-life friends. He is known as the dogcatcher - as in, he chases after everything and is only able to catch the dogs. Maybe he wants his buddies to think that just once he can catch something much better........ Maybe he wants you to believe he had an affair so that you will divorce him. Sorry, sneaking around for sloppy seconds is not my style. Your husband did say it was yours though (See Feb 9 post). I thought that was rather ugly of him to tell me about that. It's really none of my business. But I guess that is why you would assume that I would engage in the same type of behavior.
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See her Yo Jackie! post - "I always answer". Hmmm. I am sooooooooo glad to see that everyone jumps to the conclusion that this was me that "e-mailed" when all along I read and post here.
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Considering that there are well documented lies that you told on this post, 'everyone' will be inclined to believe that you emailed the message - me included. Sorry, but you ruined your credibility with your first post. See June 7 and 10 posts. All along you do not just read and post here - you also text, make threatening phone calls and have your attorney send out lawsuits.
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As long as this blog is here there will be posts.

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News of the tautological.

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Or maybe I will start my own blog. Don't know yet.
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Excellent idea - I look forward to you transcribing what your husband says happened. No doubt he will be honest and truthful. LOL Just remember, it is libel if you print/post lies. Which is why I never worried about getting sued for libel as I have been truthful on my blogs (and supplied supporting documentation) - and why you are reduced to suing for IIED instead.
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I am sick of someone who was an active and willing participant acting like a victim and putting this crap on the internet.
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Exactly where do I say that I am a victim? And if it makes you sick why do you read it? And now that I reread your statement, it appears to apply to you! I am sick of you, an active and willing participant, acting like a victim and putting crap on my blog.
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Sick that she can't get over it and move on. Wonder how long that will take?
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Considering that I stopped posting in March and only started posting again when YOU texted me for 'more information' that is an absurd statement. I had hoped that posting more information would get you to leave me alone.
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Still uses an e-mail addy associated with Lurch, her ID with Lurch, this blog about Lurch.
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Using an existing email account was the easiest.......I'm not going to bother to make up a new email acct and ID. This blog would be rather strange if I suddenly started posting about my favorite equestrian activities... I would start a NEW blog for that. Oh, wait a minute, I did that already :-P
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Geez - GET A LIFE and MOVE ON!
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FYI Ides - I'm not the one who visited this blog 62 times in the last 2 1/2 weeks - you are. And that is just from your home account. There is someone using a Blackberry browser that has accessed it just as often and your times don't overlap.............. Wonder who that is???

Ummmmm - You're kidding, right?

Ok - I saw the message from Ides of March that she posted on Saturday:
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Since you brought it up - what is the "irony" of The View From 32? I just wonder...........
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Gave it some thought. And marveled once again at the audacity of her request (safely made on her computer so she wouldn't have to interface with me) and her total lack of a backbone.
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Summary background:
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Spineless behavior #1
Ides texts me that I have an 'interesting blog' and requests more information from me. I generously agree to meet her if she so chooses. Obviously she lied to me about it being 'interesting'. She decides she (and her husband - his name is clearly on the paperwork) would prefer to sue me instead.

Spineless behavior #2
Posts comments to my blog - not very nice ones. Lies repeatedly on the blog. Documented for all my followers to read.
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One of Ides' comments: Mack- no to your question. She couldn't even look me in the eye, let alone tell me she is smearing my life on the INTERNET. Slunk away from me like a dog.Want to look me in the eye and tell me your side of things? Share your "library". Just name the place.
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What a bunch of horseshit! Having offered to meet with her/talk on the phone etc - guess who proved that they were the true 'slinking' dog? See June 10 for details of that situation (something wonky happened with that comment - it disappeared and showed up in a strange place)
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Spineless behavior #3
Used her RECENTLY DECEASED (I believe June 8?) mother's email account (jlf1946@domainxyz) to elicit information. Any idea how creepy it is to get email from a dead person? What an ugly, spineless tactic. Lying that she is a loyal reader just interested in what I meant. I offer once again to speak with her (privately on the phone or whatever) and she obviously is too afraid. Tell me who has the problem. That is so wrong for so many reasons.
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Spineless behavior #4
Posts to blog as if her behavior is totally normal and as if it weren't her email using her dead mother's account!!! Since you brought it up??? I bring up lots of stuff. So what?
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Ides of March and her husband are a PERFECTLY matched couple. Nasty, lying, sneaky AH's. Both use underhanded tactics to try to get something from me.
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Apparently Ides is unable to figure out that type of behavior is exactly the reason I have this blog!!
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Ides -
Go ask your husband what the irony is of the email address - I am sure that he will tell you the truth - DWS. And - yeah - ask him the story behind DWS as well while you're at it. I have no doubt that he is just a fountain of truthful information!! hahahahahahaha

I know that you don't believe anything I post anyway.

Yo Jackie!!! Another detour...

The View From 32

We are back to the strange again. I got an email from someone named "Jacquotte." The email address was jlf1946@domainxyz.com.

I am 99% sure it was from our friend Bertha.
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This is the complete email - no greeting or signoff:

I have been following your blog for awhile now and was waiting for the irony of the e-mail address you listed.

May I ask? Is it something to do with this guy? LOL.
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I have a co-worker who reminds me of this guy. He hangs around too long, gives empty compliments. I think of your blog whenever he passes by. What a loser!
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OK - as I know that Bertha's mom's name is Jacquotte Letty Frewin, I find it rather strange that I would get an email from someone who just so happens to have the same exact first name and initials. What are the odds? Most people who are curious would just post a comment/question on the blog. I always respond. If they had been following for awhile, they would know that. Hmmmmm.
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So I sent an email back asking if jlf stands for Jacquotte Letty Frewin. As expected, no response.
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So, on the off chance that you are NOT Bertha, I'm apologize. Please just post to the blog so everyone can read the response.

If you are Bertha, QUIT THIS SHIT. GET A BACKBONE AND GIVE ME A FUCKING PHONE CALL AND TALK TO ME INSTEAD!!!!!! I do not bite. I hate sneaky shit. Lurch must have told Bertha that I was stupid so she thought I would fall for this. Lurch told me (long before his pursuit) that Bertha was smart (he frequently bragged about what he had - it always turned out to be mediocre). It appears Lurch lied to both of us.
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What do you guys think? Am I paranoid?

After the new job - it begins again

OK - so I am going to try to get back on track.....this follows the June 17 entry about getting a new job.

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After Lurch made it quite obvious that he was interested in me and it was obvious he only wanted one thing, I got another job within the company. It was located at another facility and had ABSOLUTLEY NOTHING to do with what I was doing before.

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That did not stop Lurch.

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I had been in the new job for a couple of months and Lurch did his 'holiday' thing and at New Years and I got the midnight text. I wondered what would happen next. Well, I did not have to wait long. I got a phone call from Lurch and he told me that he was doing a presentation on MY PRODUCT LINE!!! Holy shit. That would be like having a person who specializes in rebuilding domestic Model T engines and having them go off and be the expert at a conference on the latest foreign design electric trains with all the bells and whistles. It made absolutely no sense. I talked to my business development guys - they had no clue either why an old 'motor' guy would be doing trying to represent their brand new, state-of-the-art product.

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But no matter what strings Lurch pulled to go to this conference that he was so obviously not qualified for, I still had to help him with his presentation. As I enjoy my job and did not want to lose it by letting the company down (or pissing off Lurch who was still on staff at the time - and could get me fired for not doing my job), I had to come up with something. So I arranged for him to deal with someone else...... LOL

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Lurch did not get what he wanted - i.e. working closely with me on his presentation. However, that did not stop Lurch. Now that he felt like he had 'connected' back with me, he was back in full force trying to convince me that he was dumping the ball and chain, Bertha. Once again, he was back to telling me that he was just miserable with Bertha and that I was the woman for him.......yeah right. Up next: The 'list'

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What he really meant: I still REALLY want to have an affair with you. You thought I was making up shit before - just wait and see now that the holidays are over.

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If he really meant it: he would not have contacted me until he was divorced. Forget the lawyer crap at this point - papers needed to be signed and final if he was serious and not just another guy looking for a piece.

There is one thing that really stands out for me during this whole saga. Never be dependent on a man. Do whatever it takes to be able to support yourself. Get any training you can. Go to college - do any job that will give you $$ towards paying for it. Work full time for a couple of years - and continue to work at least part-time after you get married/are in a committed relationship (any type). NEVER rely on someone else completely. Anything can happen and you have to be able to take care of yourself. You do not want to end up like Bertha where you have to make pathetic excuses to stay where you are and blame innocent victims because you have no where else to go. .

I have been on my own since I was 13, so I probably have somewhat of an advantage on being able to take care of myself. I have always had to look out for myself and don't trust anybody (even though I do try - but it is not unusual for a guy to let you down - just read the newspaper or watch TV - lots of examples out there)

Anti-social psychopath/Narcissistic personality disorder

I would like to call your attention to Hoppytoad79's comment on Aug 5. She is right on with her analysis! That fits Lurch to a T. It is straight from the American Psychiatric Association's Diagnostic and Statistical Manual. I couldn't believe I was reading it - Hoppytoad79 read my mind - I actually sent Lurch that analysis - highlighting exactly what she bolded. (Us New Yorkers are smart :-)) This was part of one of the many letters that I sent to Lurch trying to get him to leave me alone. I wonder if that is one of the letters he shared with Bertha? Ides_ of_March - did you ever see a letter similar to this in your situation???

The psychopath is defined by an uninhibited gratification in criminal, sexual, or aggressive impulses and the inability to learn from past mistakes.[10][11][12] Individuals with this disorder gain satisfaction through their antisocial behavior and lack remorse for their actions. Characterized by many short-term marital relationships. Robert Hare describes people he calls psychopaths as "intraspecies predators[33][34] who use charm, manipulation, intimidation, sex and violence[35][36][37] to control others and to satisfy their own selfish needs. Lacking in conscience and empathy, they take what they want and do as they please, violating social norms and expectations without guilt or remorse".[24] "What is missing, in other words, are the very qualities that allow a human being to live in social harmony.

Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a personality disorder defined by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, the diagnostic classification system used in the United States, as "a pervasive pattern of grandiosity, need for admiration, and a lack of empathy."[1]

Thank you Hoppytoad79 - your analysis and insights are much appreciated.

Things about Lurch I have not talked about:
*his past drug abuse
*aggressive behavior
*hates boredom - he totally ignores people speaking at mandatory meetings because they are 'stupid' and not worth listening to.
*disregard for safety of self or others (rides horses that are not ready to be ridden - told me about a horse (Allergy Medicine) who threw him and kicked him in the head).
*hates his boss (his boss hates him too - and recently demoted him)
*has no long-term goals (other than to get sex from his co-workers, wife's students, girl at grocery store checkout, secretary, anybody!! etc)

Things about Lurch that I have not seen but others have told me about:
Lurch loves to use intimidation - and due to his immense size, he uses it frequently.
Due to the type of job Lurch has, he stays within the law - which is also why he is avoiding drugs right now - he did tell me that when he gets out of the job he is in, he will go back to the drug habits that he picked up in California (while running naked on the beach!!!!!). Eye bleach - quick!

Lurch's Favorite Sympathy Tactics

Lurch frequently uses the 'sympathy play'. He tells you a sob story so that you feel sorry for him and hopes that you get annoyed or angry at the person who was so mean to him. (Similar to when he gave Bertha the letter...........)
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Here is a good example. Lurch's dad had to have heart surgery. Lurch went out of his way to tell me very specifically that only he and his mother would be going to the hospital during this critical operation. I asked him if Bertha would also be going. Rather than just saying no, he jumped right in and told me that she had other things to do - like give her horse a bath or go shopping for new riding clothes. I said that did not seem right - she should be there to give you support during the operation. He then said that she was a very selfish person and did not want to be bothered with such messy, unhappy events! Holy Shit! Could he have made Bertha seem any worse??
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During his dad's surgery, I got lots of phone calls from Lurch updating me on his dad's progress. At this point I had not even met his father. Lurch appeared to be looking for my support because his mean selfish wife would not provide it. Of course, being the nice person that I was, I talked to him and gave him encouragement and wished his father a speedy recovery. Wow - how could you not feel bad for a guy who's wife won't support him during such an event?
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Another favorite victim game Lurch likes to play is the "I do everything around the house" game. According to Lurch, he does all the cooking, laundry, dishes, pays someone to clean the house (and to make it worse, he says that Bertha is a pig), all the mowing, trimming, feeding animals (including all of Bertha's dogs/horses etc), gets all the animal food (hay is a real PITA), does the grocery shopping for his food because all Bertha will buy is crappy, non-nutritious food for herself, all outside maintenance of the house/barn/fencing, stall cleaning, truck/car/trailer maintenance etc. etc. All on top of his full time job, whereas Bertha is unemployed.

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He tells you in a certain way like - "whew, just finished doing all the dishes and the laundry - only have mowing the lawn, feeding all the animals, and cleaning stalls left for the evening, and when I come back in the house I will pay all the bills. Boy, it's a lot of work for one man to keep up this place." Which, of course, begs the question - "What is Bertha doing? Doesn't she help?" Naturally he acts all coy and says that she is too busy with showing her horses and hanging out with her friends to do any work at home. Yeah - right..................
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How can you tell the guy is a player in the above scenarios? Any time a guy tells you how crappy his wife is and how fabulous he is (and has not yet made the appointment at his divorce lawyer) - RUN!!!!!!! It does not matter what the situation is - a decent man will not do that - EVER. The player will tell you a couple of bits of information encouraging you to ask questions to 'drag' the rest of the story out of him and he tells it with such great reluctance. Hah! That is BS.

If he talks nasty about his wife, he will talk nasty about you too.
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Lurch uses the sympathy play quite a bit. Yeah - I fell for it in the first example............ :~C

Let's follow the money - Part 2

OK - so what was Lurch's inspiration to use horses to pick up women? Why it's no other that Pit Pirelli. Lurch is a lifetime member of Pit's club and has attended several of Pit's clinics - without Bertha. I wonder if Lurch watched one of Pit's earlier videos where he describes why horses are the best for making $$ and picking up women?
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In the video, Pit joked about how his clients are mostly women in their 30's and 40's - usually lonely wives/divorcees with a life long dream of riding a 'horsey' and they have lots of money. Pit then joked about how they are willing to spread open their checkbook as well as their...well, you know. You just have to give them lots of compliments (even if you don't mean them) and make them feel 'speshul.'
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Well, apparently Lurch took this to heart. He needed a gimmick too - and so he decided that he would try to get one of those 'movie horses' and take it to events around the country to rustle up some business. There are hundreds of these horses - each horse movie has dozens highly trained stunt horses to perform in the movie. So Lurch gets one of these. (He likes to take all the credit for the horse's training too.)
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So now Lurch has the horse, which he gets paid to keep for the group he represents, and he gets to take the horse around the country and use it to try to pick up women. Lying to the women that he rescues poor starving, beaten thoroughbreds just makes him seem even more wonderful.
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Lurch leaves Bertha at home when he goes on these trips - even though he says she begs him to go along with him. (How many women do you know that would beg a man to go with them after he supposedly asked them repeatedly for a divorce??) He said she had the nerve to show up at one of the events because it was on their anniversary weekend (October). He kept calling me that week telling what a great time he was having and then he said that the old ball and chain showed up on Friday and he was now miserable. He actually had the audacity to tell me that they slept in separate rooms at the hotel!!!! And he thought I believed it too. Not.
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I do believe that Lurch is very successful at these events - there are lots of lonely, desperate women out there. Look at Bertha. Have you seen the scores of women at these horse events/clinics that fit that description? They just about fall out of their pants just looking at these horse trainers at the clinics. I saw it myself at a recent Clinton Anderson event. One woman was actually CRYING because Clinton talked to her for 3 seconds!! OK - so he looks good in his jeans, but jeeeeeeez, crying???
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Lurch told me about one woman he met at an event that 'really liked what she saw' (yes, that is exactly what he wrote in an email) and was coming up to his place to pay him to learn about horses. How convenient that she was coming up during the week that Bertha was going to be out of town. Divorced, lonely, money to burn - SCORE....................
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Next - some of the tactics.
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Time has gone by and I have had a chance to reflect on things that Lurch did, said, and wrote and talked to a couple of people that know him (most hate him - no surprise there). When you put it all together, Lurch is even more evil then I first thought possible. There is a special place in hell for males that try to take advantage of women for their own sexual pleasure or control - right along with wife beaters, rapists, and child molestors.

In case anyone is interested....

Our 'friend' is still posting at the other blog. This time she specifically requested that I post the letter in its entirety - probably should have done that the first time. So it is posted on the other blog. Just adds more credibility to what I have been saying...

Let's follow the money - Part 1

Studies have shown that between 75% and 85% of all pleasure horses (in America) are owned by women. In addition, most women are compassionate people and respond favorably to men who appear to have the same trait.

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Enter Lurch. He, too, has observed both of these phenomenon and is taking full advantage of it. Lurch calls himself a 'horse rescuer' and and frequently gets himself quoted in newspapers and magazines and brags about the hundreds of horses he has saved. Not........

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To me, a horse rescuer is a person who devotes their own time and money to saving a horse that is destined to die. Lurch portrays himself as that type of person.
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The truth is SOOOOO far from reality.

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This is my rescue (a ~25 yr old grade mare - blind in one eye and cripple):

Before (I wiped my image out because I hate pics of me with braces)

and this is the same horse - many $$ later in her newest pasture (she is wonderful to work with and has tons of spunk - I call her my spicy enchilada!!):

From the vet who checked her over to the farrier who trimmed her HORRIBLE feet, to the hours of grooming and day-to-day chores, it took lots of my time and my money. And while I like my vet and farrier very much, they are NOT horse rescuers. They get paid to do what they do and would not do it if there was no money involved. I am not trying to 'toot my own horn' so to speak, but a true horse rescuer will do it for the love of the animal, not the money they can make from doing it. And that is where Lurch and I disagree. Vehemently.

Lurch calls himself a horse rescuer.

I had a convsation with Lurch where he declared that he would only 'rescue' OTTB (off-track thoroughbreds) - nothing else. I asked him about other breeds - he said he was not interested. I asked he what he would do if he saw a starving grade horse out in a dry pasture. He said he would do NOTHING - there are other organizations for that. HOLY SHIT!!! He said he would let the horse DIE!!!!

Much later I overheard a conversation he had with another co-worker that explained it all - Lurch was bragging about all the money he made from helping to rehabilitate thoroughbreds that were fresh off the race track. Wow - he is in it for the MONEY! (Subsequent conversations with Lurch confirmed that he only took in horses that he would get paid to help retrain).

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I also learned that there are quite a few organizations across the U.S. that are devoted to saving thoroughbreds from the race track and that they PAY people like Lurch to retrain them so that they can be adopted. Sounds noble, but if you will only do it for money and will let a grade horse die - you are nothing but a greedy SOB.

Of course, Lurch will tell you that the owns several of those OTTB's - what he won't tell you is that he kept the cream of the crop so he wouldn't have to spend any of his money to buy horses for Bertha for all of her expensive showing.

So, what does this have to do with his adulterous behavior?? Up next - part 2

When Lurch was assembled they missed a part - his heart

Why would I think that Lurch is capable of hurting my horses? Logical question. Here is the short answer. Lurch told me this story and I nearly gagged!

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Lurch was created in the 1950's as the only son of a couple that moved frequently due to the father's occupation. One of these moves was out of the states to a small island. As the new housing was very small, Lurch's mother, Gertie, gave Lurch's 125lb dog to a farm where he could run and play and not be cooped up in the new tiny 2 bedroom apartment. To make up for it, Gertie got Lurch a smaller dog when they got to the new home. Gertie absolutely SPOILED her only son. Unfortunately Lurch turned out to be a selfish, cruel little boy.

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He hated the new dog so he decided to get rid of it. Since it was a small community, he could not give it away or chase it away (he tried - the dog always came back). So Lurch decided to kill the dog in a sneaky way. He learned that small dogs easily choke on chicken bones so he fed the dog chicken bones whenever he could.

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One night, after a particularly large meal of chicken bones, the dog went into Lurch's bedroom choking. He was in obvious pain. Lurch woke up, saw the dog was choking, smiled, turned over and WENT BACK TO SLEEP. And, yes, the dog died!!!

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Anyone capable of going back to sleep after seeing a poor, defenseless animal in extreme distress is capable of anything! Especially if they think the law does not apply to them.

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So if a guy EVER tells you a story from his past that is even REMOTELY close to this - RUN! They are cruel, heartless individuals who couldn't care less if they hurt you. In fact, sometimes they will do things to hurt you because it gives them a sense of power and control. You can't change them, so don't even try.

A new beginning

Sorry I had to start over - the last blog was getting depressing. I hope she goes away and takes care of business. There is nothing more pathetic than a woman who defends her cheating husband and presents what he says as the truth. It's like those women who marry men on death row that they have NEVER MET and claim that they know the men are innocent and spend their lives (and $$) trying to get them out of jail.
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She's baaaaaaaaaack!!!

(See comments on last post)

'The letters you wrote my husband are beyond hateful"

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REALLY?????!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did he show you the ones he wrote telling me how much he loves me and wants to be with me? The ones where he is unhappy and stuck in a rut? I thought not....

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Text message from Lurch: "Well, darn- I called and thought u were asleep, so I plugged the phone in & went 2 trim Cowboy. I sure do miss u. Will b so glad when this is past & we can c (sic) what life has in store 4 us. U r wonderful...

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And I bet he only showed you the ones that would make you angry at me. A smart move on his part - he deflected all your anger in my direction so you would ignore what he has done. He played you rather easily.

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I do not understand why Bertha is showing up here posting - that is just asking to be the focus of the blog. If the blog is causing 'intense pain' one does not read it, much less post to it! And it is messing up the blog - I simply wanted to write a blog about the tactics married men use to cheat on their wives using a real life situation. I surely did not want to get into a pissing contest with the gullible wife. I never said I was perfect and that I did not make mistakes. That does not change the lies and tactics Lurch used.

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So, let's have a little background here. The type of background that I am sure Lurch would not provide. The letters (actually, snarky stories) started as one of my final efforts to get Lurch to let leave me alone. I was walking on a tightrope because Lurch was in a 'position of authority' at work and I seriously felt like my job was in jeopardy if I did not handle it right. As I had been nice to him, Lurch no doubt would have done EXACTLY what he is doing now - putting the blame on me (per the letter from the lawyer - Lurch claims that I am angry because HE REJECTED ME!!!! Holy Shit Batman!!!!!!) I have never in my life pursued a man, much less a married one. And I sure as heck don't want anyone's sloppy seconds - or thirds - or fourths........

I thought I had finally gotten him to back off and quit telling me he was leaving Bertha (i.e. - he would agree to leave me alone by a certain date and after that date, he would disappear and quit contacting me) Well, it did not work. That certain date? Well, by that date Bertha was going to be out of the house and moved in with her mother. Of course it did not happen. (And yes, I have a whole series of emails on that. My blog is getting totally messed up - I had planned on following this whole saga in a chronological order)

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So when that date came Lurch of course told me the whole sob story of how things were not working out and how now he was hoping for a MIRACLE!!! Yes, that's right folks, now he was hoping for a miracle so that he could be with me. The miracle, of course, was that Bertha would be somehow magically be gone and he could be with me.

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Miracle: An event that appears inexplicable by the laws of nature and so is held to be supernatural in origin or an act of God

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You have no idea how I gagged when I heard that. I have never heard a more spineless thing in my life. Let me go back to my original postings -

What he really means: I ain't doing jack shit, but I'm still pulling stuff out of my ass because I want a piece of yours.

If he really meant it he would have said: I have an appointment with my divorce lawyer. No miracles needed.

So, what about those letters. I wrote a WHOLE SERIES of letters to get him to leave me alone. Letters about how lousy of a person he was, how rotten of a person I was, how crappy of a horse trainer he was, how awful he was at his job - you name it - I wrote it. Lurch had told me early on how he did not like himself/his decisons/his skills critisized. So I thought that if I wrote stuff knocking down everything about him he would leave me alone. It did not work. He said that he knew I did not mean any of it and he would ALWAYS love me.
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Let's look at the fact that Lurch gave Bertha that letter. What kind of man does that? Most normal women want the type of man that would do whatever it took to protect them from any kind of hurt. That is what a real man does. Instead, he INTENTIONALLY gave her a letter (written to him for the purpose of getting him to leave me alone) to hurt her to protect HIMSELF.

Let me make this perfectly clear - LURCH GAVE BERTHA THAT LETTER FOR THE SOLE PURPOSE OF HURTING HER TO GET HER TO DIRECT HER ANGER AT ME AND NOT AT HIM.

I wrote the letters/stories to get him to leave me alone. The letters were not meant for Bertha - Lurch made the choice to hurt Bertha by showing them to her. What a man.
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I LOVE my readers - you guys are spot on........... (well, except for one of you)

You can't make this stuff up!!

Got a letter a few weeks ago from 'the lawyer .' Lurch and Bertha will be filing a lawsuit against me for the 'intense pain' the blog is causing them if I didn't delete it completely and within 24 hours of receipt of the letter. Specifically, they are claiming IIED - 'Intentional infliction of emotional distress' .

Seriously.

I am not making this up.


So, I have been putting together my case the past couple of weeks.

Ironically, I am taking some advice Lurch gave me awhile ago regarding someone bad from my childhood: "Don't let him win."

For some unknown reason Lurch has singled me out and decided to try to mess up my life - first with the affair crap and now with this. And to think I was actually nice to the guy!!! Sometimes you just have to take a stand and say I've had enough.

House hunting in the RAIN???

I got home today and it was pouring rain. As I was driving down my road, I noticed something strange. The car in the photo above (YGF-XXXX) was stopped in front of my house and as I pulled around them to get in my driveway, I saw that the guy in the driver's seat was taking pictures of my house. The woman that was with him (with very noticeable 'buck teeth') gave me the dirtiest look. Do I know them? Not at all. Is my house for sale? Absolutely not. The two houses down the street are for sale (and have been for 2 years), but they were taking pictures of MY house. As I live on a dead end road, they had to continue up the road and turn around to get out of my subdivision.
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So I took pictures of them as they left. They did not take pics of any other house and did not even slow up a little when they went by the houses that were for sale, so I do not think they were househunting.

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Why would someone take pics of my house in the pouring rain and give me a dirty look? Am I being paranoid? I do not trust Lurch or Bertha AT ALL. Especially after Bertha threatened me with her lawyer and Lurch told me on several occasions that he thinks that the law only applies to 'stupid' people. What do you guys think?

The Chase is on!!

OK - so this great guy at work tells me he loves me and wants to date me even though he is married (but he is getting a divorce - any day now), so I have to do whatever it takes to be near him. I work at facility 'B' and he works at facility 'A' and even though his trips to facility B have increased exponentially so he can visit me, I just know that I have to do something!!! What should I do? I know - I will update my resume and try for any and every job at Lurch's facility so I can be near my honeybunch!!! I will make lots of phone calls and call in some favors. There are so many women he works with that I need to defend my claim on him and eliminate the competition. He is such a prize - I cannot lose him!
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Ooops - that is Lurch's fantasy - now for a dose of reality!
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Yes, I did update my resume. And I did call everyone I knew to get a new job. However, I was looking for a job at facility 'C' and only C - Lurch had no reason (other than one or two times a year) to go there. I even sent my resume to lots of outside companies. Anything to not have to work with him. It took a couple of months to get the new job and finally move. While I had to split my time 50/50 between the old and new job during my transition period, at least I was at a different facility. That new facility, by the way, takes longer to get to and is not nearly as nice as the one I left. I would have rather stayed at facility B, but C is MUCH nicer because Lurch is not there!!! The interesting part about this whole thing is that I actually told Lurch I was taking the new job to get away from him - he had the nerve to tell me that he was still dumping Bertha and was going to prove me wrong because he loved me and wanted to be with me because I was perfect for him. It was just taking longer than he expected to get rid of Bertha. Yeah - right.

Up next: so what does Lurch do about my move???
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Full disclosure - I was seriously considering looking for a new job (at any of the 3 facilities) because my boss - who was not supposed to be my boss when I took the job - was very 'inexperienced' and made some REALLY bad decisions. However, I was going to wait another year before I started looking..........................

To my readers - thanks :-)

The end ..... of Bertha

Bertha - please do not contact me again. I do not wish to meet you at the library or anywhere at anytime EVER. Based on your threat and your input to the blog, you have obviously made up your mind that everything Lurch tells you is the truth and nothing I would say would make a difference. So stop - NOW. Nothing good could come of it.
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It appears that your goal of communicating with the people who had input to the blog was for them to stop posting, you succeeded; however, if your goal was for me to stop blogging, you failed miserably. (BTW - the number of hits to this blog has NOT declined.) I will not stop just because you threatened me. Apparently Lurch did not inform you that I don't take kindly to threats. Especially when I am right and know I did NOTHING wrong.
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You know absolutely nothing about me except for what Lurch has told you (think about that for a few minutes) - and in your desperation to justify your actions, you seem to have swallowed his crap hook, line, and sinker.
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It is quite sad that you are the one attempting to contact me when Lurch is the one who is totally and completely responsible. Any man of character would admit his mistake and not let you go through the anguish of contacting the person he tried to have an affair with - how humiliating for you!!! But that is Lurch - nothing is his fault and he is the victim of everything. No doubt his ego is being boosted as you vainly attempt to silence me. And he is the one responsible!!!!!! A real man would not do that. But then again, a real man would not have lied to try to have an affair with me.
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There is very little that you can say that will stop me. Threats are the stupidest thing you can try. Women need to know how low a man will go to try to get sex with them and use them. They need to be armed with the right questions and know what actions to look for (words can be such pretty things, but mean NOTHING if they are not followed up with concrete actions).
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If just ONE person reading this blog learns how to identify horrible users like Lurch in the world and avoids it, I will have been successful.

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My next couple of postings will be to those of you who emailed me and wanted to know if I encouraged Lurch in any way to cheat on his wife. You will be surprised. It is fine with me if you continue to email me instead of posting directly to the blog.

Got one!!

Thanks to the person who emailed the comment that was deleted directly from the blog (the one at 4:57 am). It turns out it was from our friend, Ides of March, and Bertha - please feel free to tell the nice folks out there if I messed up the posting.

-the ides of March is simply the 15th day of March . No more, no less. From reading your comment on that I really do see that you can only see the negative side of anything from your eyes. You are full of bitterness and hate. I am sorry that you see yourself as a vicitim.
I am praying for you.
Beware the Ides of March is from the play of Julius Caesar - my comment was not negative - just a neutral observation. This reference to 'backstabbing' is well known in literature. Lurch did tell me that you do not read books, so your lack of knowledge about this is understandable.
Where do I say I was a victim? Do you really think that 'snarky commentary' is bitterness and hate?

....and for your education of others on how to avoid a married man persuing (sic) you (since this is the point of of your now edited blog)
The point of this blog (which has NEVER changed): "I had never encountered a married man who cheated before and was fascinated by the audacity of the lies he told to try to get me to have an affair with him. This blog will cover some of his bullshit. And will serve as a warning to others - what signs to look for and see if they are really serious or are just playing games." Not the same as how to avoid a married man pursuing you. You missed the point completely.

1. Do not participate. Period. Do not email. do not text. do not 'consider dating' them after they are divorced. Be strong enough to NOT engage. All marriages have problem times.
Conflicts with MY stated purpose of the blog, but works well with your version of it. Lurch did not say your marriage had problems - he said it was completely and irreversibly dead - and had been for years. He said there was no hope of ever it working out ever and the only thing left to do was the paperwork.

2. Do not divorce your husband to be with someone else's and then be bitter
Strange comment, but excellent advice. I certainly agree.

3. Do not 'blog' publicly with your 'on-line diary' which just points the finger at the other person when you had a choice to not be involved. You admit to being 'curoius' about how far it would go, and then where (sic) hurt when it stopped? WTF? Talk to a girlfriend. Airing dirty laundry is nothing but hurtful. Yes-note the time of my comment (like my text)....this has me not sleeping.
WTF? is right!!!!! But to follow your theme - How does not blogging publicly stop a married man from pursuing you? Does this mean that only women who blog will have a pig chasing them? I did not blog before Lurch chased me so using your logic he should not have chased me. What about before the internet existed - why did men pursue then??? So many questions.... BTW - Lurch aired your dirty laundry, not me.

I find it interesting that once I did contact you about this blog that you edited it. Changing Lurch McAddams to Lurch M. and removing your photos about your endurance ride?
???I cannot change the name of the blog. Yes, I removed two posts (only one photo) - they were not part of the blog - they were only there to let the people following the blog know that I was gone for awhile - they had served their purpose. What nefarious reason do you assign to me for removing them? and BTW - I have edited it before too!!!!! And I'll edit it again if I want to. Never to change the content - just to clarify something better.

I am sorry that you find so much pleasure hurting others.
Exactly where did I say that I found pleasure in hurting others?

Oh! and the comment about my mother? Not nice.
Wait till you hear what Lurch had to say about your mother - THAT'S really not nice. I was just commenting on what he said. And I agree totally - it was awful!! And I do mean AWFUL.

Again, you are in my prayers.
People who say that 'you are in my prayers' think that they are morally superior and are quite condescending. So quit it. Pray for yourself instead. You need help way more than I do.

Damn - lost the comments - and another lie!

Apparently there were about a dozen comments in the "comment moderation' section. Several from Bertha. A really sincere one from Amity (if you are still reading this Amity, thanks for your input, I appreciate your explanation.) I hit publish and expected them to appear in the blog - they did not. In fact, one existing comment got deleted! Anyone know how to retrieve a 'published' comment? And, yes, it did say the comment(s) was published - I did not hit delete. And why do some comments go straight to the blog and others sit in the comment moderation section? I have the box checked that all comments are posted immediately.


One of the ones I tried to post actually proved once again how Bertha lies.


It was addressed from Bertha to Mack and had something along the lines of 'she wouldn't even look me in the eye and just slunk away'.....and something about 'telling her that I was writing about her on the internet'........referring to a horse tack sale I went to where Bertha was also.


Well, this is what had Bertha texted me (right after the 'Learn more' text):



So which one is it Bertha - did I refuse to look at you or did I look you straight in the face? You can't have it both ways.

Mac - if you have Bertha's comment, I sure would appreciate you recreating it - thanks. I want to make sure my facts are straight.

So here is the situation - I went with a friend to a tack sale in March and Bertha was there. Awkward situation. What the hell did Bertha expect me to do - walk up to her and make a scene? The friend I was with went up to Bertha and talked to her - I did not. It seemed like the most prudent thing for me to do at the time. I neither slunked by nor looked her straight in the face. I glanced over at her, continued to look at the sale items and left with my friend - that is MY recollection of the event.

Does ANYBODY think it would have been appropriate for me to have approached Bertha at the tack sale?
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BTW - As my friend and I were leaving the tack sale, Bertha trotted out of the building looking for me - she ran right to the truck as we were pulling away. Based on her comments it seems like Bertha wanted to make a scene.
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Not the right place to ask questions, tho.
Damn right it was not the place for questions!!!!! If Bertha had truly wanted to talk to me she would have picked up the phone and called me months ago. Period.

Lies straight out of the gate!!!

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Total loss of credibility from the start!!!!!

Please read comment from Bertha/ 'Ides of March' on last post and my comment - then this will make sense .........................................

Bertha's first sentence in the comment section:

What I wanted to discuss with you was the removal of this blog.
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This is what Bertha texted to me last month in response to "For what purpose?" (She had said 'Interesting blog. Meet to discuss?')

She starts out with the snotty "The obvious" - as if I can read her mind and know her motives. She then goes on to say "Learn more." But in her comment on the June 6 blog she says she wanted to discuss removing the blog.

Note to Bertha - if you want to have any credibility at all - DO NOT START WITH AN OBVIOUS PROVABLE LIE!!!!! People have a really hard time believing ANYTHING you say or being sympathetic to your cause if you lie to them. 'Learn more' does NOT mean 'removal of this blog' - it means the opposite. You wanted more information. And I provided it. If anyone else thinks that 'learn more' means 'remove blog' - please enlighten me.

It is beyond decency. I TOTALLY agree. What your husband did is beyond decency. How nice that we can find some common ground.
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I am absolutely SICK over the content and tone of this blog. Me too! Another point we have in common. What your husband did is absolutely disgusting. And I have barely scratched the surface of what he did!
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Who finds joy in posting things like this? Who is finding joy?
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Your blog is set to strike out at others, not to educate as you claim. Don't tell me what my blog is set to do. Apparently you have not read the entire blog and its comments. Just ask Annaliisa. She is finding it helpful - as do others. There are plenty of assholes like Lurch out there - I think it is helpful to know what to look for and what to do.
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Why not write in a diary? Good idea (yet another thing we agree on - damn - we could be best friends at this rate!) - this is like an online diary of sorts - with an educational bent.
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Why post this publicly? To educate - read the beginning of the blog - it is clearly spelled out.
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This whole thing is filled with partial information to hurt and show spite. Wow - and how did you come to that brilliant conclusion? From Lurch? The liar? The one who has something to lose - like his house? A POA every night? Oh please. Your husband has EVERY REASON to lie. What reason do I have? I never planned on you or Lurch reading it, so why would I lie? If I had wanted to show hurt/spite I would have posted the link to this blog on every local board around here as well as COTH. I then would have posted about the time Lurch had his dick out while standing on the side of the road trying to convince me to have sex with him. That would have been to show hurt and spite. You really should have thought that comment through. Are you really stupid or naive or desperate enough to believe what Lurch says? Really pathetic.......
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What about all the e-mails and texts that you sent my husband? What about them? There is nothing that I have done that I am ashamed of - I would LOVE to hear how Lurch explains (lies about) those. Bring 'em on!!! No doubt he has you convinced that I was pursuing him and he was helpless against me.
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Yes, we have them. Oooooooooh - So what? Somehow this sounds like a veiled threat - what do you guys think? And it sounds rather sick - your husband is trying to screw me and 'we' have my emails and texts?? I'm sorry, but that just sounds so totally fucked up. Readers - please help me out here - what do you think she is trying to say?

.What "uninterested" single woman does that for months?
Months??? You are truly sad. Is that what he told you? You think 'months' is a lot? Did you think I would say it was weeks or days? Sorry - Lurch chased after me for a year and a half!!!! (Damn - that is a long time - time just seemed to slip by!!) Again - if you had read the blog you would have seen where I clearly stated that I would have considered dating him only if he had been telling the truth about divorcing you and actually got the papers. (Note to readers - ALWAYS get the papers first - absolutely no exceptions - I don't care if his mother-in-law is on her deathbed - they are just lying in an attempt to use you and are desperately trying to buy time)

He is the one who told me it was a HUGE mistake to marry you on the rebound from his other wife and he was regretting it and that he was miserable with you. I was VERY clear from the first day that Lurch told me he loved me and wanted a realtionship with me that I WAS NOT INTERESTED IN A MARRIED MAN. What part of that do you not understand?

Lurch is the one who persisted in telling me that he wanted a relationship with me - the only thing I am guilty of is wondering how creative he would get in his lies to me about divorcing you. I told him repeatedly that I was NOT INTERESTED IN A MARRIED man - we had some very interesting arguments where Lurch told me he was divorcing you and I told him he was full of shit. He tried his damndest to convince me he was dumping you (papers first ladies.....)

Lurch chased me - DEAL WITH HIM - I guarantee he'll do it to you again, and again, and again.

Before Lurch decided he (desperately) wanted to get in my pants, I thought he was a nice person and considered him a good friend (BTW - he is universally hated at work - I thought he was just misunderstood - boy, was I wrong). He came across as considerate, witty, and hard working and in early conversation implied he was totally miserable with his life - later on he told me straight out that he was miserable and you were the reason. I'll post that email sometime. It was ALL lies to manipulate me and gain sympathy/trust. He is not the man I thought he was - he is just a POS.
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Why do you post negative comments about me? What do you consider negative?

Why did you threaten me with your lawyer? Guess you found out pretty quickly you had NO CASE. By the way, on that phone call, you told me you would never contact me ever again and to never contact you - not that I ever would - 'I have nothing to say so talk to my lawyer' you said - and yet, here you are posting on my blog. Also, I bet you feel pretty stupid trying to fake me out with making your phone call a 'restricted' call - your number came through every time you texted me. And, just so you know, I have known your cell number for a long time - so it was pointless all around.

Interesting note - why on earth would anyone choose as their screen name (ides of march) something that means 'backstabber'? That is creepy in itself!

A New Twist

OK - so I had never intended to discuss Lurch's wife, Bertha, even though she was texting me regarding this blog. I thought she was kind of a pathetic victim of Lurch's sick twisted world and really, other than being married to Lurch, was not part of the story of how much of a user and a POS Lurch is........

Well, Bertha has decided to become part of the story by threatening me with her lawyer. So let me start with the beginning of this arc.

Bertha sends me a text message at 1:59am on 5-11-09 -

Interesting Blog. Meet to discuss?

Note the time of the text!! The only other person to annoy me with text messages in the middle of the night was her husband, Lurch. He would let me know he was missing me (yeah, right) or to tell me that he was flying out of town the next morning. Yes - it did annoy me and I DID tell Paul that I did not care where he was going and that he should be telling that crap to his wife - not me. Anyhow, I get this text from her.

My first thought was "You have got to be kidding." My second thought was "You have got to be kidding." My third thought was "You have got to be kidding." Is she crazy? Why on earth would I want to discuss anything with her?

So, I text back during normal waking hours:
"For what purpose?"
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I can't imagine what the hell she would want from me - it is pretty obvious from my blog that I can't stand her husband. And I found it hard to believe that she found it 'interesting.'

The only place I would have met her would have been at the police station after they frisked her for weapons. (Lurch had told me that she was prone to violence when she was angry - and I would not take a chance in case he was actually telling the truth).

IMO she was up to no good. And, just like her husband, she proved me right with her stupid, childish phone call to threaten me with her lawyer.
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Next: What she claimed she wanted.

The Truth Shall Set You Free!!!

Things are getting really strange - got a threat today...............

"Substantial Truth
"Truth" is an absolute defense against defamation. See New York Times Co. v. Sullivan, 376 U.S. 254 (1964), and Time Inc. v. Hill, 385 U.S. 411 (1967). Consequently, a plaintiff has to provide convincing evidence of a defamatory statement's falsity in order to prove defamation.
The law does not require that a statement must be perfectly accurate in every conceivable way to be considered "true." Courts have said that some false statements must be protected for the wider purpose of allowing the dissemination of truthful speech. The resulting doctrine is known as "substantial truth." Under the substantial truth doctrine, minor factual inaccuracies will be ignored so long as the inaccuracies do not materially alter the substance or impact of what is being communicated. In other words, only the "gist" or "sting" of a statement must be correct.
The substantial truth defense is particularly powerful because a judge will often grant summary judgment in favor of a defendant (thus disposing of the case before it goes to trial) if the defendant can show that the statement the plaintiff is complaining about is substantially true, making the defense a quick and relatively easy way to get out of a long (and potentially expensive) defamation case. "

From:
http://www.citmedialaw.org/legal-guide/substantial-truth



"In Virginia, the elements of a defamation claim are publication of an actionable statement with the requisite fault on the part of the defendant. To be “actionable,” the statement must be a false statement of fact that harms the plaintiff's reputation in the community or deters other persons from associating with him or her. "

From:
http://www.citmedialaw.org/legal-guide/virginia-defamation-law

And so he starts his 'New Year' campaign - yet again

OK - so this was his reason he quit 'chasing' after me in November:
It had to be done on my terms, or it would never work. We were making me feel like a complete failure. So I "ended it".
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"We" were making me (Lurch) feel like a complete failure???? WE?? What planet is he on? I told the AH to leave me alone while (if) he took 'care of business' (ie - get a divorce) and I am making him feel like a failure? Is he crazy? His terms: give him a POA on the side while he continues to tell me he is getting a divorce - any minute, just wait and see...... (Reality: the holidays were coming and I wanted to be with the people I really cared about.....you are not one of them)

Ended 'it'??- Lurch makes it sound like as if we were dating - only in his sick, twisted mind!!!

BTW - Lurch IS a failure - as a husband, father, son, friend, employee, boss, co-worker, trainer, human being etc.
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And this was his reason for starting - yet again!!
It (ending it) was much easier at first, I guess because I was angry. But you were always "there" - always on my mind. Little reminders everywhere. Looking at news stories and laughing with you. Thinking of all the things that make you you and made me fall in love with you. Wanting to be with you.
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Angry? I tell him to do the right thing and he is angry at me? What a guy - trying to make ME feel guilty. Wanting to be with me? Yeah right - he goes home to his (clueless) wife everyday and thinks I am stupid enough to believe he has asked her for a divorce. Earth to Lurch - when your unemployed wife is publicly making plans for the upcoming horseshow season (that takes lots of $$$) that is a clue that she has no plans to move out. How dumb does Lurch think people are? Or, the reality of it is, how dumb does Lurch think I am?
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If he really meant it: If a man TRULY loves you, he will move heaven and earth to make it happen - no matter what. When a man tells you it has to be done on 'his terms' and he does nothing but flap his gums and try to make YOU feel guilty - RUN! They don't give a shit about anyone but themselves.
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Up next - the 'divorce' list.
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To the people who do not like this blog - DO NOT READ IT IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT!!!! No one if forcing you to click on it.

To the person who is texting me in the middle of the night - please grow a spine and call me during the day - otherwise, leave me alone. You obviously have my cell number and I have no clue what you are really trying to say/ask. Your messages are contradictory and I don't feel like answering you in 160 characters or less.

The Strange 'Boyfriend' post

This was really strange!!!

Situation: I was at an industry conference and was talking to a current customer and had to call Lurch regarding the status of a job for that customer. The evening before at the conference I made several contacts for new, potential customers. One man in particular seemed to be very interested in our services and I spent a great deal of time with him explaining what our company could do for him. So, in my call to Lurch about the first customer, I told him about the very promising lead from this other person.

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Timeframe: This happened after Lurch declared he loved me and wanted to be with me and before he divorced his wife, Bertha. Oh, wait a minute, he NEVER intended to divorce Bertha...........He just wanted a POA on the side.

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When I asked Lurch about the message, he said he felt very jealous of the guy because I seemed to be quite excited about the sales prospect. Duh - message to Lurch- of course I was excited about the prospect - that customer has turned out to be one of our better customers - thanks to ME!!!! I also told him that it is impossible for him to be a jealous boyfriend because a: he is a married man; and b: we are NOT dating as I DON'T date married men. At which point he assured me (once again) that he was divorcing Bertha and he loved me too much to lose me and was going to 'take care' of business.

Happy New Year

It is January 1 in the afternoon. I finally look at my cell phone (I had it on 'silent') and see that I have a new message. Who could that be?
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At EXACTLY midnight, I got a message from Lurch!!! "Happy New Year" A simple one to be sure, but a message nonetheless. Actually, I think the real message was the fact that he sent it to me at the stroke of midnight and I was supposed to think that he was all alone thinking about me. What a crock of SHIT!.
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Now that the holidays were over, he could start his pursuit again. And boy did he start.


I had heard horror stories about married men chasing after a POA, but this was INSANE.

The Holidays are Coming

So, Thanksgiving and Christmas were just around the corner. I wondered just how the Lurch would handle that situation. After all, he had been telling me he loved me, how much he wanted to be with me, and how life was too short to waste with people you don't care about (one of Lurch's life lessons' he learned from his dead horse Melvin). So, if that were true, who would he want to be with during the holidays? After all, if he hated Bertha and couldn't even stand the sight of her the way he claimed and loved me and wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, wouldn't he want to spend the holidays with the ones he loved? That was his "Melvin" philosophy.

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Well, as I knew he was lying about wanting to be with me, I was curious as to how he was going to handle that situation. He did not disappoint.

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It was the middle of November and I got my usual phone call from him (probably his 10th of the day to me) on his way home (he always called me, I only called him on work related stuff) and we were in the middle of a conversation about the pros and cons of a construction project and he just hung up on me. (He claimed later the connection was lost).

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And that was it. Suddenly no more phone calls, no text messages at 2am, no more emails. He fell of the face of the earth. (No loss there!!! LOL)

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Anyway, due to work I had to call him a couple of days later. And I asked him what happened. He hems and haws and finally says that he thinks we MIGHT not get along (WTF???) so he said he was no longer interested in pursuing a relationship with me, but didn't feel the need to tell me. He's an even bigger AH than I thought.

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OK - so even if the horse squeeze he was telling me were true, what kind of a man does that?

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I do not hear from him for about 6 weeks - so guess what happens AFTER the holidays? So predictable.

Missed one.....

I realized that I left out a part that happened a couple of weeks after Lurch declared he loved me and that he wanted to be with me.......
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(Don't know why this pic insists on being sideways - LOL) .

I know what I want. I know what I need 2 do 2 have it...........


I got this text after I told him to shit or get off the pot - he was the one who declared that his marriage was LONG over and he was getting a divorce. I sure as hell did not pursue him. He could not have it both ways. From the very start he kept telling me that he wanted me (hahahaha) and that he ALWAYS got what he wanted. Who doesn't like a man who gets off his ass, gets busy and gets stuff done?
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So, the VERY NEXT NIGHT I get this message:
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Tonight we talked. She is leaving when she finds a place. My left hand is bare.

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Wow - is that convincing or what? Sounds serious to me. Here is a man who makes shit happen!! Jackpot!!!

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However, a little voice inside my head kept saying "let's see if she REALLY moves out" or is he just making this crap up? I always give someone the benefit of the doubt, but I do realize that most men are just out for NSA sex.

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Knowing what I know now - it would not surprise me if he took his ring off when he thought he might run into me. He is that much of an AH. Typical cheater.
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What he really means: Women take this ring symbol stuff really seriously so if I take my ring off, she'll think I really mean it and maybe I'll get 'some'.

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If he really meant it he would have: Called his lawyer and made an appointment on xyz date.

Work has been a beast these last 2 months............... :-)

Holding hands by the water

I was walking around outside around the waters edge and watching the couples and, of course, thinking about you and I walking around, holding hands and laughing and talking. I know you are amazing, and I know I love you.

OK, so 3 days after he tells me he is is not doing well, he is back to telling me he is thinking about me (walking by the water and holding hands no less - isn't that romantic??) and loves me. He writes this to me while he is on a trip all the way across the U.S. Hmmmm, he's away from Bertha and thinking about cheating on her. Wonderful!!! What a guy. He is no closer to divorcing her or anything close to it. What a nut.

I need a break. And wow - I get one. This guy really is psycho. I always love to get blamed for something I didn't do. Up next: The library.

The Expected Turnaround

.I need to tell you that I’m not doing real well. I feel sick to my stomach and like my heart is going to explode. Most parts of my life have pretty much fallen to the wayside. It is just not within me to continue like this or
to do the things I want to at this point (be with you) – not while there are still loose ends here and things that need to be discussed and decided on as far as who gets what and how much and all that stuff.

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Ok - he came on to me and now HE is not doing well??? WTF does that mean? Does this mean that he really doesn't hate his wife as much as he claims? Does it mean that it is not over with her? Continue like what? What a bunch of horseshit. He knows that he has no intention of divorcing Bertha and is trying to buy time.

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When he first told me that he was interested in dating me I told him that he needed to take care of things at home first because I don't go out with married men. At first Lurch said that he and Bertha had been over for years and it was just a simple task to end things and he did not need any time. Yeah - right.

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It sounded like a new tactic to me. I told him to call me when he had his shit together. In Cemetary State, that would mean about 6 months. I wondered how long it would be before he contacted me again. I knew that if and when he did that Bertha would still be there and nothing would have changed - he would just have another stupid excuse/story.

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Next: 6 months?? How about 3 days?

Campaign mode

I Love You. You are unlike anyone I have ever known-so right.
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IMY. Badly.
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God I miss u.
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U R more beautiful everytime I c u.
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It would b real hard 2 put n2 words how much I love talking 2 u.
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LY!!!
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Wow - he is laying it on thick now that he has informed me that Bertha is packed and ready to go!!! He's not getting any though - no matter how much he might want it! lol
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I told him point blank (in the 'beginning') that I was not interested in a married man. He is trying his hardest to convince me that Bertha is toast and he wants a relationship. Why don't I believe him - or why should I??? Men like him are a dime a dozen.
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As I posted, Lurch claims that Bertha is moving out and makes up this really stupid story that she is packed up and ready to go. So I keep pushing - I wanted to see what would happen. He probably thinks that he will 'get some' if he says the right things. Hence, all the txt messages about how much he loves me and misses (???) me. What an idiot. I realize that he must only date/marry women who are stupid/desperate enough to believe his BS. He is WAY out of his league. I just know that he is going to make it seem like he is a victim and can't help the situation he is in.

FYI - I do keep telling him over and over that I am not interested in a married man - he keeps telling me that he is leaving Bertha. In no way am I leading him on. I continue to push him away - he is quite persistent.
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So I keep asking. After all, HE is the one who is intently pursuing ME (where have I heard that before?? lol) and trying to convince me that he is leaving Bertha and not your typical POS married SOB.
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The sad part? Imagine if you were Bertha and your husband was sending messages like this to another woman. Horrible. Even if she did pursue him intently and he married her on the rebound and it was a huge mistake - or so he claims!

He must be serious

Got a text message:

"Got home and the house has her packed boxes all over"

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OK - so Bertha is packed and ready to go. Even the pictures are off the walls. Later he told me that Bertha is going to move in with her mother. Boy, that sounds like he is serious to me!! I just knew he was not a piece of shit like every other married guy who says he is going to leave his wife. hahahahahahaha. I was just waiting for the punch line. He did not disappoint.

The Mansion

I have never been to Lurch'shouse. However, throught the miracle of the internet, you get to see all kinds of stuff. This is the 'mansion'. This is the culmination of Paul's life dreams. (Lurch has a VERY well paying job I might add - He bought this in his late 30's / early 40's.)

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This is what is known in real estate lingo as a 'starter home' - usually for people under the age of 25. It is approx. 1,000 sf, built in the 60's, and has few ammenities. It is also located near a rock quarry and tons of trailers. I am not picking on trailers (or starter homes) - but rather the fact that Lurch talked like he is living in a place like this http://www.downunderhorsemanship.com/ranch/ but the reality is so different.

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The thing that bothers me the most about this is the trash at the front door, the broken window, clogged gutters and the general lack of maintenance. All those things reflect the values of the owner. How 'bout them 4 dogs? What about that fencing?

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OK, enough of that. What's up with the trailer on the property?? This is where it gets interesting. One of his ex-father-in-laws lives there!!! Lurch could not afford the home (around $50K about 11 years ago) and had his to have his (then) father-in-law help buy the property. What is really bizarre about the whole situation is that the ex-wife visits all the time and is trying desperately to get Lurch back!! Wow - who wouldn't like THAT situation????

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It gets even more bizarre - this particular ex-wife had an affair while married to Lurch (there is an ongoing theme here) and got knocked up by one of the guys Lurch works with. She told Lurch that he was not man enough to get her pregnant and then turns around and she gets an abortion!!!! WTF??? He told me he NEVER even wanted the two kids he has; what made her think he wanted any more? She divorced him because she didn't think he was much of a man - why the hell does she want him back???? He hasn't changed one bit.

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I do believe Lurch when he says that this ex wants him back because she actually tried to get a job working in his department to be near him - SICK!!!

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This situation is so weird - it proves the saying "Truth is stranger than fiction"